Tomorrow

525,600 Minutes

October 6 feels like it was a lifetime ago.

October 7 feels like it was just yesterday.

It is, however, tomorrow. 525,600 minutes have come and gone, like that.

Tomorrow it will have been 525,600 minutes since 10/7, when Israelis woke to the worst attack perpetrated against Jews since the Holocaust.

Tomorrow it will have been 525,600 minutes since the Jewish Diaspora awoke to public and proud displays of rampant antisemitism worldwide.

Tomorrow it will have been 525,600 minutes since Israeli families were torn apart, and the Jewish world and their allies mourned and fought for those murdered and taken hostage.

Tomorrow it will have been 525,600 minutes since our lives changed forever.

Five Stages of Grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance

A year later, finding the right words to express the grief, anger, fear, and loneliness seems almost impossible. Thinking of the stages of grief, I question what stage we as Jews are in, and where I am at personally.

Most Jews skipped the Denial Phase.

Most Jews are likely still in the Anger/Bargaining phase.

I don’t think we will ever get to Acceptance.

Light in the Darkness?

I consistently find myself searching for some light in the darkness.

This year I gained clarity in who I am:

I’m that Jew.

I’m that Jew who understands how important it is to stand up for ourselves and against antisemitism. I’m that Jew who spends countless nights thinking about how to make our future better for our children. I’m that Jew because my son, and other Jewish children, are watching. I’m that Jew because our parents and grandparents are watching, expecting us to carry the torch they kindled forward.

This year I made new friends. I met likeminded people, and we bonded over truth, conviction, standing up for what is right, embracing our Judaism, and speaking out, even when it is hard. This year we found increased closeness and strength in our Judaism and comfort and unity in our communities. 

This year I and many others found a strengthened connection and deeper sense of who we are in our both our Jewish values and the community we are a part of. To paraphrase Bari Weiss: we are not on this earth to fight antisemitism; we are here to be and do Jewish. I consider it a duty, privilege, and obligation to do both. And, to borrow from the Yiddish Feminist, we need to remain: Bravely Jewish, Proudly Jewish, Unapologetically Jewish, (and) Fiercely Jewish. This is where we will continue to find light in the darkness. 

Israel

I have been to Israel countless times. During my most recent visit in May 2024, I quickly realized how much both everything and nothing had changed.

After landing, I turned on my phone and saw that there had just been sirens due to rockets fired at Tel Aviv. That was different for me as this was the first time I had this type of experience while visiting Israel.

The airport was different. From the moment one enters the airport terminal, there is constant reminders of the hostages being held captive under 100KM away in Gaza.

I was in Israel volunteering with several others (mostly) from North America – doing our part to help the agricultural sector, which has taken an extremely hard hit since 10/7. Daily, we bused around the country helping in different regions. We spent two days volunteering on farms, one a tomato farm, the other a cucumber farm, and two days volunteering at vineyards.

While visiting the Givat Yeshayahu Vineyard, we heard a story and learned a valuable lesson. While all Jews (and many non-Jews) know the right time and place to say the words “L’chaim” (“To Life”), now, when we say “L’chaim,” it should be said and thought of differently, it should always be said with true meaning, as we no longer can take life for granted.

To the plain eye, Tel Aviv is still Tel Aviv – the expensive coffee is…well, even more expensive (war tax). Want to go to a popular restaurant for dinner? Better have a reservation! But everywhere you go, there are also constant reminders of 10/7. The country appears to be the same, but everything is different. 

Almost equally as important to rolling up our sleeves to help and give back, was taking the time to bear witness. Going to Hostage Square and hearing from people whose immediate family members were captive in Gaza was heartbreaking. Walking through a simulation tunnel was much harder than expected. It is unimaginable what life must be like for the 100+ hostages still being held captive in Gaza. All that we do know is that they must come home – it has been 525,600 minutes too long.

Visiting the Gaza Envelope is hard to describe and I will not be able to do it justice, but here’s my attempt at summarizing this experience. 

We started by visiting Kibbutz Netiv HaAssara. We could hear the war in the (close) distance, while we learned about what Hamas perpetrated there on 10/7, the lives lost, and the heroes who defended their (our) land.

We then visited the Nova Festival site, where we heard from a 10/7 hero, the head of security for Kibbutz Re’im.

We then walked through the memorial. I spent most of the time searching for the memorial of Savyon Chen Kipper, who was murdered at the Nova Music Festival. Savyon and I met when she joined a Birthright trip I led in 2012. I felt mixed emotions when I found it - I was happy, even excited I found her. I took the below photo. Then someone asked me if I wanted them to take a photo of me with her – and then I was overwhelmed with sadness – she was there but she was gone.

On the way out, I took a photo of Noa Argamani’s hostage poster – while I had obviously hoped, it was beyond my wildest dreams she would be rescued shortly after I returned to Canada.

525,600 minutes 

A year later, one thing I know for sure, is I am proud of the Jew I became on 10/7. I don’t want to go to back to the Jew I was 10/6.

Jews and Israelis are fighters – we are resilient – above all else, we value life – and we will dance again!

May the memory of every victim forever be a blessing. I pray for Israel, those defending Israel, and that the remaining hostages will return home alive and safe.

Am Yisrael Chai!